Irrevocable Trust
Irrevocable Trust: Item 1
Joseph, my brother,
I love you
and you finished college,
so, I hereby
appoint you executor
of my literary estate.
This is not an honorary
position. Should you
accept, you will be tasked with
real duties and responsibilities,
both as fiduciary
and as a critic.
Firstly, there is the matter
of the timely and equitable
distribution of the financial
assets that currently reside
in a numbered offshore account.
(See Page 57, Appendices A, G,
and 9a). These funds, consisting
primarily of accrued royalites,
advances for novels, novellas,
haiku, prose poems, and recipe ideas,
either unbegun, unmiddled,
unended or, in some instances,
completely uncomtemplated.
The first $10 I bequeath
to my sister. $8.75 should go
to your sister and
any funds generated thereafter,
either through future advances
negotiated by my agent,
posthumously, on my behalf,
accrued interest as it compounds,
and the nickels,
I hereby empower you
to set aside in a Foundation,
in the name of Federico
Garcia Lorca,
to help those less fortunate
educate the more fortunate
on whatever subjects
you see fit.
Any funds generated
from future licensing agreements,
between my estate and
any third-parties, whether
they involve my likeness,
T-shirt sales, or admissions fees
paid by person(s)
to gain entrance to
my childhood home/museum
should also be directed,
in whole, to said Foundation.
Irrevocable Trust: Item 2
Joseph, I think I
made clear,
in Item 1, my wishes
as to the distribution
of any and all
extant financial assets
retained by my estate
at the unlikely event
of my demise.
I feel secure in the knowledge
that you will faithfully
execute the instructions, therein.
Now, let us proceed
to your charges as Executor
of my numerous,
if not always beautiful,
attempts to appear
in The Norton Anthology.
On the third row
of the mahogony bookshelf
in the secondary
Master Bedroom
of my principal residence
(address redacted)
you will find 13 empty 4-ring
Mead binders
inscribed with images
of the leaves of a plant
from the Family:
Cannabaceae Sensu Lato.
These binders are leftover
from Junior High School.
Under no circumstances
should these binders
be put to any use.
Assuming there is
a suitable market,
these binders
should be offered
at auction, under the
auspices of Sotheby’s,
Christie’s or a House
of comparable reputation
and standing.
Any proceeds derived, therefrom,
should be deposited,
directly and forthwith,
into the endowment fund
of the Federico Garcia Lorca
Foundation.
On the first shelf
of the aforementioned
well-crafted mahogany fixture
you will find an IBM
Selectric typewriter
sitting atop 3 reams
of unopened 8.5 x 11
paper and a receipt from
Office Depot dated 10/6/1994
Please return paper
to the store location
indicated on the receipt.
Any and all other documents
you may encounter there,
containing any or
various combinations
of the 26 known letters of the alphabet
you are hereby empowered
to toss straight up
into the motherfuckin’ air.
–March 30, 2019